Officially licensed video games -- from the horror of the Michael Jackson arcade machine of the 80s through any number of movie tie-ins -- tend to be more about the license than the game. A few games have risen to the alpha dog spot in the pack of tie-ins, but most of them are indistinguishable also-rans that find their way to the bargain bin. Cesar Milan’s Dog Whisperer doesn’t look to be one of the few distinguished games.

A comparison to Nintendogs or Dogz would be tempting, but inaccurate. Those earlier titles were about bonding with a digital pet. Dog Whisperer is about helping digital pet owners resolve problems with their digital pets.

Really.

Dog Whisperer casts you in the role of an apprentice dog psychologist. The first several scenarios are designed to train you to diagnose a dog’s problem, respond with the appropriate behaviors, and then assign the owners homework. The diagnosis comes primarily from a description of the problem which is provided in text form by the owners. (There’s a lot to read in Dog Whisperer.) Once you have a diagnosis, Cesar will make you complete a quiz to ensure that you’re right. Then you outline the activities which will correct the problem. Next you’ll prepare to interact with the dog; Cesar wants to ensure that you are projecting a Calm Assertive energy. To judge your energy, Cesar makes you take a quiz. Next up you’ll play one or more minigames which involve walking the dog, rollerblading with the dog, petting the dog; playing with the dog; or verbally correcting the dog. Most of these games involve using the stylus on the lower screen in a prescribed manner. Once you’ve completed the exercises successfully, Cesar wants you to give the owners homework to keep the unwanted behavior from repeating. He does this by giving you a quiz.

The quizzes start to repeat themselves quickly so mastering them is no problem. Ditto the minigames. Unfortunately, some of the minigames involve waiting for the dog to misbehave and then correcting it. This adds to the tedium of the experience.

While you’re interacting with the animal, Cesar will occasionally give you verbal encouragement in the form of a hearty “You’re doing great” or “Well done.” It was tough, at that point, not to feel like one of the dogs that Cesar trains.

Graphically, the screen layouts are clean and the simulated dogs are convincing; not enough to inspire any real emotion from the player, though. If the intent of Dog Whisperer was to create a training academy for Cesar’s methods, they’ve succeeded. If the idea was to create a game, this misses the mark.

The educational nature of the game is enhanced by the Cesarpedia; an on-board reference work which gives you access to Cesar’s knowledge about dogs and information about Cesar himself. While mildly interesting, the Cesarpedia adds very little to the game experience.

Young players who fancy themselves budding dog psychologists might glean something from this (although the title screen warns that the techniques are for entertainment purposes only and shouldn’t be construed as actual advice). Most, though, will find the repetition and simplistic nature of the play to be tedious and not worth the cover price of $29.99.